About fights and reconciliations
by Ferowyn
Summary: Prompt: 5 times Fili and Kili fought over something meaningful and ended up sulking and one time they fought over something stupid and ended up striking up a relationship WARNING: Incest


This was prompted by CatWesker ( w ww . fanfiction u / 1713575/), a fellow freak and addict ;) :

_5 times Fili and Kili fought over something meaningful and ended up sulking and one time they fought over something stupid and ended up striking up a relationship_

This did not really turn out the way I wanted it to be and, well… meaningful is an elastic term O.o Hope you like it anyway! (=

**About fights and reconciliations**

1. Bear

Having a younger sibling sucks. Fili does not know about sisters, but he can hardly imagine that they any are less annoying than brothers. Considering the fact that dwarvish girls are often spoiled terribly because there are so few of them they are probably even worse – getting everything they want not only because they are younger and their eyes are bigger and their parents like them better, but because they are girls and anyway, girls are stupid and he has no idea why any grown up dwarf would spend the rest of his life with a woman voluntarily, but his brother is stupid as well – and maybe he should consider himself lucky that Kili is only a boy, but he looks like a girl anyway, doesn't he? Maybe that is why their mother lets him do whatever he wants, because they both act like women and women always prefer other women to men. Really, Kili gets to do whatever he wants and never does Fili. It is terribly unfair. Seriously!

If only uncle Thorin were here… but he is not, and so Fili stands alone against two girls (he chooses to ignore the fact that he knows perfectly well that his brother has the body of a boy, having bathed together with him often enough, but maybe Kili should wear dresses – nobody would see the difference!). If uncle Thorin were here he would not help Fili directly, because if he favours one of his nephews he always favours Kili, but he would be all majestic and regal and Fili would only have to look at him in order to know that it does not matter whether his mother thinks that he has ruined the teddy bear or not, because one day he will be the king and if he only behaves like uncle Thorin it does not matter what Kili says. Kili will never be king, because he is younger. He can only be the princess. If uncle Thorin were here Fili could smile regally and call his brother a little girl and feel like the king he is going to be one day.

However, uncle Thorin is away (as most times) and thus Fili is standing in the corner of the room, facing the walls, and angry tears are running down his cheeks. He knows, future kings are not supposed to cry, but he cannot hold back the tears, no matter how much he tries, and since nobody can see his face nobody can see them as well, and if nobody can see them nobody knows that he is not behaving like a prince should be. (He forgets about the trembling of his shoulders and the furious, hiccupped sobs, which are clearly audible.) His only comfort is that Kili is crying at well, he can hear him, behind his back. Like a little girl. (Fili may also be crying, but he is crying angry tears and Kili is crying because his teddy bear has lost a leg. Angry tears are definitely more regal than tears over a stuffed animal, which is more girlish than anything else!)

It is not his fault that the leg of the bear has been torn off. _Really_. He only took the bear because he needed someone to be killed by his epic warrior prince and the bear was closest. (He is _not_ playing with stuffed animals! He is fifteen and really too old and too majestic to do so. Kili is young – seriously, ten is little older than a baby – and a girl. He is playing with teddy bears. Fili is fighting epic battles and the bear has been the villain, dying when his warrior prince saves the world. There is a huge difference, obviously.) It is even less his fault that Kili had decided to save the stupid teddy and grabbed its leg just when Fili had let it crumble, deadly wounded and realizing that the epic warrior prince really is epic. And it is most definitely not at all his fault that his brother had pulled, demanding his toy back with that annoying whiny voice of his. And then the cloth had been torn and the leg had come off and Kili had been running for their mother, crying like a baby, and Fili had been scolded as if he were the most evil person in this whole world. Clearly, his mother does not love him. At all. Well, he does not love her either! Nor does he love his stupid brother!

And anyway, if he had ever gotten a teddy bear like this one there would have been no need to take Kili's!

2. Sweets

Kili thinks he might die from the fury surging through his veins. Or from the disappointment. Or from both. Anyway, the world is terribly unfair. Uncle has given both of them a little bag filled with sweets he has bought in the different towns of men he has been to and although he has claimed that their content is absolutely the same Kili is a hundred percent sure that is not true. He has seen his brother eat a few pralines that he had not found in his own bag.

Well, he is not surprised. Fili is the older one, and he is going to be king one day. No wonder everyone is favouring him. Kili thinks it terribly unfair, because it has not been his choice to be the younger one, but that does not change anything, does it? By now Kili is twenty years old, and his brother is twenty five. When he had been only ten he had cried and sulked and tried to do something about it, but by now he has accepted it to be the way it is (after all he is no longer a baby and he is behaving like a prince should be, unlike Fili). Unfair, but unchangeable. (Really. Accepting the world as it is is the most regal a twenty year old dwarf can get!) Ten years ago his brother had been given metal warriors for his birthday while Kili had only received a teddy bear, and now uncle Thorin brings his brother more sweets. It is probably always going to be like this.

When Kili had been given the bear Fili had said that it was a stupid, girlish gift and that only babies played with stuffed toys. (It has never occurred to Kili that those words were exactly the reason for him to be jealous of Fili's gift.) The older one had scoffed even more when Kili had decided to call the bear Durin, because Durin had been a super-dwarf and Kili may not receive as epic gifts as his brother does, but calling the bear Durin had made it more epic and that had made up for it not being a knife or a quill or the metal prince Fili had gotten from Thorin. His brother had said that no teddy bear should be called Durin, because it dishonoured the name of their forefather, but Kili had decided to stick with it none the less. Maybe even because of his brother's comment, after all it is Fili who is going to be king one day and who is allowed to do whatever he wants already because of it and it means that he will be the one who has to deal with the stupid dishonoured name of their family.

Kili thinks about Durin and frowns. The bear is hidden underneath his bed, because he is too old to play with stuffed toys by now, but he does not want to give him away. Even if only to remind his brother that there is someone dishonouring the family name.

Huffing he tears his thoughts away from the bear (he is also too old to even think about it) and stares at the few bonbons he has still left. Fili had claimed that Kili had eaten some of his sweets and so their mother had made Kili give his brother some of his own. Kili has _not_ done that. (Of course he has thought about it, because – who would not? But he has never gotten the chance to do so.) He has no idea what has happened to Fili's candy, but he knows that he has not taken it. And who could know that better than him? Still, neither their mother nor uncle Thorin seems to trust him – only because he had borrowed one of his brother's board games a few weeks ago to play with some friends and forgotten to return it!

He had never meant to keep it. Of course he would have given it back! Yes, he may not have asked for Fili's permission, but Fili never asks if he takes his stuff! Moreover, the older one had been at a friend's place, so how should Kili have asked him? That he had forgotten to put it where it belongs after playing does not meant that he has taken Fili's sweets. And how would he have? His brother has basically slept with the bag under his pillow, always keeping it close (he may be exaggerating a little, but it is close enough). There is no way Kili could have taken any of his candy, no matter how much he wanted to have some of those pralines. Why does everyone think him to be a thief now? Nobody listens to him when he says that he has only ever meant to borrow the game.

And anyway, if he had ever gotten that game himself there would have been no need to take Fili's!

3. Dishes

Fili is tempted to just take the tub and pour the water over the table. This. Is. So. Terribly. Unfair!

He thinks about the feast that had tasted so delicious an hour ago and the thought of which now has him raging with anger. Well, he is not really angry at the food, but rather at his family. Especially at his brother. This time uncle Thorin had been away for more than three years and when he had returned tonight their mother had cooked a huge dinner. It has been a long time since Fili had eaten that well (don't get him wrong, they always have enough to eat, their mother makes sure of that, but mostly they eat whatever is cheap and their normal meals are far from feasts. Fili is thirty five; he understands that Smaug's attack has left their people homeless and poor. He sees his family do everything for him and his brother and he never complains, but he still appreciates a feast like that more than most others would. That their uncle is the king has no meaning since there is no kingdom for him to rule and no treasure to let his own family live in abundance. All he can do for them is work like everyone else and he exhausts himself in order to give them everything he can, for their father has died years ago and their mother cannot work as much as him, having to look after her children) and Fili had enjoyed every single mouthful. Now that he stares at the seemingly endless amount of dirty dishes the aftertaste is stale.

Their mother had told them to help when they had stopped eating and said one of them would have to assist uncle Thorin with moving back into his room and carrying his stuff and the other one would be responsible for cleaning the kitchen. Fili had waited before saying something, wanting to discuss the matter with his brother, but Kili had cried "I'll help uncle!" before Fili had been able to only even suggest helping each other and then left with uncle Thorin, his expression unbearably smug.

Fili is _seething_.

His hands are already crumpled after being in the water for so long and there is still more than half of the plates and pots left, sitting on the table and waiting to be cleaned. He takes two more mugs and lets them slump into the tub, followed by a handful of knives and a pan. The last one creates a tiny wave, making the dirty, soapy water slop over and splash into all directions, the foam flying into the air. He curses loudly when he feels the hot liquid burning against his skin where his tunic has gotten wet and he may have inhaled a mouthful foam, judging by the taste in his mouth. On the other hand, it might still be the stale aftertaste.

Swearing under his breath he scrubs the mugs and then puts them into a second tub, filled with cold, clean water. He then puts them onto a cloth that is already soaked, not caring about the water he is pouring onto the floor. He is _not_ going to wipe that up later.

It takes him more than five minutes to get the pan clean, scrubbing away at the burnt remains of whatever, which seem to be in a very tight and very happy relationship with the metal. Finally he has gotten rid of all of them (he would never admit it, but he is sweating) and continues with the knives. Sharp knives, as he might add. Of course he cuts himself and – cursing even louder – he sucks at the tiny wound, throwing the rest of the knives into the second tub. Not all of them may be completely clean, but he could not care less at this point.

He is down to the last pile of plates and bowls when he hears the loud, roaring laughter coming from one of the other rooms. His uncle's voice is easy to pick, being deeper than the ones of most dwarves, and his mother's voice is beautifully bright (for dwarven standards). Kili's is also clearly distinguishable and Fili is tempted to throw the plates against the wall. Here he is, doing the job he would have (just for once) offered Kili to help with – still bleeding a little and soaking wet, starting to freeze although his chest is still burning after the unexpected contact with the hot water – and the others are enjoying themselves. He is never going to do _anything_ for his brother ever again.

4. Sword

Kili kicks the wall. Hard. Now his toes hurt, but his anger has not subsided, not a little bit. Great.

He is forty now and he really does not understand why his brother – who is forty five – is allowed to start learning how to wield a sword already and he is not. Five years is like nothing! He probably should leave the training grounds, because watching only makes it worse, but still he is hiding in the bushes and does not look away for one second. It has been a month now and Kili has been observing every single one of the daily training sessions.

So far Fili has been taught by uncle Thorin, Balin and Dwalin and Gloin is going to be here tomorrow.

Kili has not been talking more than necessary to his brother ever since the lessons have started. By now they get along quite well most of the time, having grown up a little (only too well does he remember how often they had fought when they had been really young and he is not sad that this time is over) and do almost everything together. Kili had expected Fili to tell his uncle that he would not learn how to wield a sword without his brother, as the younger one would have done it. They have both been waiting for this moment for years now and Kili _knows _that he is as ready as his brother is.

He remembers the way Fili's face had lightened up when their uncle had announced that he was going to train him, and how he himself had waited for his brother to ask for allowing the younger one to be taught as well. However, Fili had never even mentioned it and the bitter disappointment is far from subsiding.

He stares at his brother blocking an attack from Balin and tries to choke back the angry tears. He is not going to think about why this disappointment hurts so much (too much, to be honest) because there is no need to deal with anything concerning his brother. Fili has made clear that being together is quite obviously way more important to Kili than to him and Kili is going to acknowledge this. He has had his brother yell at him because he has pulled back so much, and trying to make him feel guilty, but that does not change anything about the disappointment. Maybe when it is replaced by anger, maybe then will he be able to fight with the older one and afterwards everything will be fine once more. However, Kili highly doubts that this is going to happen anytime soon. He stares at Fili's broad back, and his already elegant moves and does not even bother to look away when he realizes that he is _staring_. He is hiding and the fact that he has to watch his brother from the distance if he wants to spend the day with him brings all the bitterness back, stronger than ever.

If he is honest he is not so disappointed because Fili has not said anything about being allowed to learn how to fight while Kili is not. He is disappointed because Fili has traded the time they had spent with playing pranks and studying half-heartedly for hours on the training grounds and their evenings in taverns, singing and drinking, for going to bed early without hesitating. However, he is not honest, with himself and less with anyone else, and he chooses not to acknowledge how much he misses his brother. After all, Fili obviously does not miss him at all. He is still waiting for the anger (because he has every right to be angry, so many of their plans falling through and quite a few promises being broken) but at the moment it only hurts.

Already he is well aware that he is most likely not going to choose the sword as his primary weapon when he is allowed to learn how to fight. He will never be as good as his brother, not with the older one having started training five years earlier. Kili knows he will need to be better than Fili with whatever weapon he is going to decide for, because he cannot be losing for the rest of his life. What he does also know, but not think about, is that his brother will be expecting them to practice together and if he chooses a different weapon Fili will be the one to be disappointed. Revenge is sweet, even if it hurts.

5. Friends

Fili is still angry.

Maybe he had grown a little too attached to his younger brother when he had been forty five. Realizing that he had used the sword training as an excuse to spend more time without him, despite the fact that they had been planning to start practicing together, and he had missed him dearly. After the first few months the lessons had taken less time and had been less exhausting and he had started to spend time with Kili again, although it had taken him quite some time to regain his brother's trust. The younger one had been silent for almost a year, before opening up and going back to being the happy young prince who has lots of stupid ideas and seems to be thinking about nothing but mischief.

Fili had waited for his brother to be old enough to learn how to wield a sword impatiently, knowing that he would be allowed to help teaching him. He remembers the huge smile on his own face when uncle Thorin had announced that Kili were to pick his weapon. He also remembers the way his face had fallen when the younger one had leaned back, grinning coyly and saying that he was going to become an archer. Of course he had had to learn sword fighting as well (as Fili had been taught how to throw knives as a second weapon) and Fili had been there, helping him, but Kili had spent most of his time on the archery range with one of the few dwarves who really knew what they were doing when it came down to bows and arrows and Fili had been alone once again.

He knows that he cannot blame his brother for he had done the same thing, and he had done it first. He had disappointed Kili and ruined their plans (plans they had made together ten years ago, while they had never talked about training together after their reconciliation) and it had kind of served him right that he had been in the same position five years later. That is probably what angers him most – knowing that it is his own fault.

Again their relationship had suffered a little, but Fili had tried to choke back his anger. It is still there, but he has got it under control.

However, it probably is the reason for him sitting here in this tavern with a few older friends instead of being at the party him and Kili had agreed to go to a few weeks ago. He had called it off spontaneously and come here instead, knowing perfectly well how angry and frustrated his brother would be while having to smile at everyone present at the party and explaining that there had been a _clash of appointments_ that was keeping Fili away.

The blond prince orders another pint of ale and his friends do the same. He watches his friends follow his example and no later than having received their orders one of them is doing a countdown, many other dwarves present shouting along, and then he is pouring the ale down in one go, trying to be faster than the others and to burp louder and longer and some of the liquid is running down his chin and below the neckline of his tunic. This evening is everything one would imagine when thinking of young dwarves – no longer children, but far enough from being adults – enjoying themselves. And really, Fili is – enjoying himself that is – except for the fact that Kili is not here.

It is maybe two hours later that his eyes fall upon the dwarf sitting in a dark corner of the room, alone, fingers clutched tightly around a mug filled with what seems to be mead. Fili cannot see his face, because it is hidden in the corners, and maybe he is a little drunk, but he would know these bowman's gloves everywhere.

He thinks about going to that table in the corner and talking to his brother, but then he figures that the world is spinning way too fast for him to stand up and anyway, did he not come here in order to be away from Kili? (He is no longer really sure why actually came here, but he does remember that it was to have fun, and, well, drinking competitions are fun, aren't they?) Thus he only raises his new pint mockingly and then chugs the ale, spilling more of it than swallowing. But no matter how drunk he already may be, he cannot miss the way that Kili is clutching his mug, and the bitter line of his mouth he sees when the flame of a candle flares higher for a moment and sends a flash of light across his brother's face. He feels a considerable amount of glee and chooses to ignore the shale feeling at the deep of his stomach.

Even later that night he is being hauled up, his arms slung around slim shoulders and someone is half pulling, half carrying him towards their home. Of course it is Kili, the gloves are rather distinctive, and Fili feels an unexpected rage running through his veins which seem to be filled with alcohol instead of blood. "Leave me alone." The words may be blurred, but obviously Kili understands them, for suddenly the body supporting him is gone and he tumbles, falling. "Stupid idiot!"

"Drunk bastard!" the younger one mutters, fists clenched. "You broke a promise today, there is no way I'm going to listen to you insulting me!"

Fili thinks that he has done nothing wrong. He and his brother are two different persons and they do not have to do everything together, so why is he not allowed to spend an evening with his friends? Probably Kili is just jealous of them! … Why not say that? "You are just jealous at my friends!"

"Yes, because they made you drunk but I'm the one who has to look after you!"

Fili cocks his head. "No," he says, because that's the easy part of the sentence. Phrasing the rest is a little harder. "You are jealous because I like them better."

Suddenly his brother is gone and he is sitting on the floor, in the middle of the night, alone and drunk and _really_ angry. And he does not even know whether he is angry at Kili or at himself.

+1 Girls

Kili does not say anything.

They are sitting in the forge, the door is locked and there is no way their mother is going to let them out before they have made up. Kili refuses to look at his brother when Fili sighs and he does not say anything when the older one finally raises his voice.

"Would you care to explain me what all this is about? Because otherwise we won't be able to _discuss_ it and I seriously have no idea why you went crazy."

Well, what could he say? There is no way he is going to tell his brother the reason for his little tantrum. Because of course, his brother can court whomever he wants to court. Him starting to yell had been caused by his jealousy, but Fili can never _ever_ know about that. After twenty years he has finally accepted his feelings as what they are, and it has complicated everything.

Fili gnashes his teeth, his fingers running over one of the bruises on his arm. "You owe me for that one!"

"Why?" Kili exclaims, trying to ignore the pain in his own hands. "You are the one who started the punching!"

"But you started the fight in the first place!"

"Ah, but you didn't yell back immediately?"

Fili's fist clashes against the wall. "This is leading nowhere!" He sighs. "Is it really about the courting? Do you not like the girl?" It is obviously meant to be a joke, but Kili cannot suppress the low, hysterical chuckle and the older one's eyebrows are shooting upwards. "Seriously? That is why you started all this? Because you don't like her?"

Kili is squirming. "… Basically."

Fili laughs. "Why didn't you tell me? I'm not going to chase after a girl or boy you don't like, after all you'll have to live with them as well." He is grinning. "Don't worry, we'll find someone you like."

"Somehow I doubt that that will ever happen," Kili mutters quietly – but obviously not quietly enough.

The older one's eyes are wide. Suddenly he is standing very close to Kili. "And why is that?"

Kili looks away – again – and tries to keep his breathing even. Well, he could also try to make Smaug give them back their mountain and their gold in exchange for a glass of milk. His heart is beating way too loud and too fast, surely Fili must hear that?

Maybe he does, because suddenly the blond prince is pressing him against the wall of the forge and his breath is as hitched as the younger one's.

"Then I'll have to make do with you."

"I can live with that." Kili forgets everything else he might have wanted to say, because suddenly his mouth has found a much better way to pass the time.


End file.
